MEN AND WOMEN
Four Times A Lady – Part II
Ed and Lisa Young
April 28, 2002
Ed: I heard a couple of comments, Lisa, about our little talk. Some of the guys said that we were easier on the women than we were on the men. But I don’t know if I agree with that. Do you?
Lisa: I think that we need to remember that this is not about getting even, or one upmanship. But some people are a little more sensitive about that. This is about celebrating. I think that because God has uniquely stamped men and uniquely stamped women, that is something to be excited about.
Ed: Yes. As you know, we have been talking about men and women. We have been saying that for us to realize who we are, we need to look at God. Because God as he made us in his image, made us uniquely female and uniquely male. Once we realize who God is, then we know who we are.
Before we begin to talk about some more stamps of a woman, Lisa, I have been surfing the World Wide Web and I discovered the lost chapter of Genesis on the World Wide Web. There is a lost chapter of the Book of Genesis out there, and I have a theological background, been to Seminary and all that stuff. But I didn’t believe it until I saw it, this lost chapter of Genesis. This kind of relates to where we are today. I want to read you a quick excerpt if you don’t mind about this lost chapter.
“Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely. So God asked him, ‘What’s wrong with you?’ Adam said, ‘God, I don’t have anybody to talk to.’ God said he was going to make Adam a companion. This companion would be called ‘woman.’
He said, (God speaking), ‘This pretty lady will gather food for you. She will cook for you. When you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you have had a disagreement. She will praise you. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and compassion whenever you need it.’
Adam asked God, ‘What will a woman like this cost?’
God replied, ‘An arm and a leg.’
Then Adam asked, ‘Hey, God, what can I get for a rib?’”
That’s right. You heard it first, the lost chapter of Genesis.
But all kidding aside, let’s talk about these significant stamps of a woman, Lisa. We have got the nurturing stamp. We talked about that last week, that women have this nurturing ability in their lives, greater than men do. We also talked about the whole security thing. Women have a longing for security. God’s a nurturing God. God is a God of security.
The Stamp of INTUITION
Let’s talk about stamps three and four. Here is the third stamp, the stamp of intuition. That’s not a real shocker, is it? Women have this intuitive nature.
Lisa: Would you like for us to define intuition? According to the dictionary, intuition is an extra sense for situations, discernment, keenness in perceiving and understanding. Women have this bent toward being sensitive to certain situations and they just have that stamp on their lives.
Ed: Right. The Bible says that God is intuitive. He is omniscient, meaning “all-knowing.” The Bible says he is omnipresent. He is everywhere. Those are attributes of God. The Bible goes on to say that God knows our anxious thoughts. He knows the number of hairs on our head, so he is into discernment. He is into intuition. He has given ladies a greater sense of intuition. But the thing about it is that there is an upside to this intuition and there is also a downside as well.
Lisa: God can supernaturally give everyone his intuition through the person of the Holy Spirit. When we ask Jesus Christ to come into our lives and be Lord of our life, he gives us the Holy Spirit as our source of intuition. But women, especially, because we have this stamp already on our lives, we are emotionally based and feelings-driven individuals. Is that a shock? Women are emotionally based and feelings-driven.
Ed: Yes, and God has feelings too. God is a God of feelings. God again has placed the person of Holy Spirit inside of our lives. Once we become Christians, that is the process that takes place. I would say that one of the top job descriptions of the Holy Spirit is discernment: convicting, warning, leading, teaching, and guiding. That’s all about intuition.
Lisa: Exactly. So, we need to first understand that women have this emotionally based, feelings-driven characteristic. Then when you put intuition with it that comes from the Holy Spirit within us, you have it operating in a healthy and good way. The Holy Spirit allows women by this coaching and this discernment to do several things.
The first thing the Holy Spirit does through a woman’s intuition is to help us clearly see what needs to be done. When there are a lot of things out there that beg for our time, the Holy Spirit gives us discernment and extra sensitivity to what is the most urgent thing. It manifests itself in kind of a time-management thing. We know what we should be about.
Another thing that the Holy Spirit does is give us insight into areas that we need to avoid. When we have a bad feeling or sensitivity to a certain situation that we are getting ready to enter, we can say, “Wait a minute. That’s not a place I need to be. That’s not something I need to do.” It just helps us and coaches us in areas to avoid.
Another thing that the Holy Spirit can do is to lead us to speak appropriate words in certain situations. We have sensitivity. It kind of connects with the nurturing stamp. We just have this extra feeling and sense for things that need to be said.
Yesterday, Ed and I were sitting at the kitchen table just tweaking our notes and making sure that everything was in sync. We have a house full of children. We have twins that are 7 years old. We have a son who is 10, and a 15 year old. The 15 year old had spent the night out at a friend’s house. The 10 year old, our son, had a friend spend the night at our house and the twins had a friend spend the night. So we had five children under the age of ten. So it was action.
Ed and I are sitting at the kitchen table and one of the twins came in and was getting a little down.
Ed: A little whiny and moany.
Lisa: Yes. It was Landra, a little moany and whiny. She was saying, “Mom, Laurie and Olivia have gone to the playhouse and they have taken everything out there to build a store and they are just messing it up and it’s going to be a mess and can you believe it?”
Already, earlier in the morning, she had had a little moan zone time. So, Ed and I were just going over this and I thought, “Okay, Holy Spirit, appropriate words.”
I looked at Landra and the first thought would be, “Landra, get over it. Dad and I are working.” That would be my natural inclination.
Ed: Sometimes we have those natural moments.
Lisa: Yes, we do. You can ask any one of our children and they will tell you that.
But I said, “Landra, I know that it is difficult sometimes when there are three. You and Laurie are sharing a friend and that is sometimes difficult. But aren’t you excited that we had a friend spend the night last night? And Landra, look around outside at the weather and how beautiful it is. It’s not raining like it was supposed to be. You can go back and forth to the playhouse.”
I started naming all these different things and said, “Landra, don’t you think you have a lot to be thankful for?”
She goes, “Yeah.”
Her moaning disappeared. There could have been another scenario there, and we would have dealt with it. But she just picked herself up, went outside and had a great time.
Ed: There is an upside to intuition. Proverbs 16:21 says, “The wise in heart are called discerning and pleasant words promote instruction.”
Then Job 32:8, “But it is the spirit in a man (the Holy Spirit), the breath of the Almighty, that gives him (or her) understanding.”
It’s amazing. Women have a greater sense of spiritual needs, and also of relational needs as well, with this intuition.
Jesus said in Matthew 10:16, one of my favorite Scriptures, he said, “Be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.”
Lisa: In other words, we need to be very cautious and smart as we deal with feelings and emotions.
Ed: Feelings can be fickle and freaky and they can go up and down. When we have these feelings, and this intuition, we need to go through a checklist. Because we can get into trouble when we say, “I feel this way. My emotions are telling me that.”
Our feelings must always, if they are from the Holy Spirit of God, be within the context of God’s will. Our feelings must always be within the context, guidelines and guardrails of God’s will.
A while back, I was talking to a couple who was having some marital difficulties. This guy said, “I am a Christian and my wife is a Christian. I just really feel God is telling me to marry this other lady at the office.”
I said, “You know that feeling is not from the Holy Spirit of God. I can tell you that. That is from the evil one, himself.”
Lisa: I have heard ladies say about a marriage situation or a job situation, “Well, I just don’t feel happy. God would not want me to be unhappy. I just don’t feel happy so I am going to either leave this relationship or this job.”
That is not always the nudging of the Holy Spirit. God never promises He is going to give us happiness. He promises us joy and there is a difference. Joy is what comes from within because of our relationship with Jesus Christ. Happiness comes from happenings, from changing circumstances, that are going on in our lives. There are times when we are just not going to be happy at a specific moment, but we will always have the consistency of joy in our lives once we have asked Christ to be there.
Ed: Let me interrupt you just for a second. I was having coffee with one of my close friends this week and he said, “You know, Ed, I have learned over the course of my life that commitment supercedes feelings.”
I thought that was a great point.
Lisa: Absolutely, because we take a stand, we make that commitment and then our feelings and emotions don’t play into that.
Going back to how we keep our safety level in women’s intuition, because we are so feelings based and emotionally driven.
Ed: Yes, what is the process you go through? What is that balance there so you know?
Lisa: You must, as you said, filter it through a checklist and I call that the God Grid. If it doesn’t line up with what God says and what the Holy Spirit gives us, then you have got to be careful. Because, ladies especially, when our feelings and emotions are running high, we have to be cautious because the Holy Spirit’s influence in our lives may be running low.
Ed: The evil one has the ability to make us think that we are thinking what we are thinking. But in reality, it can be the evil one making us think what we are thinking. So the same thing is true with women as well. The evil one can work through your feelings and emotions to get you off the path.
Lisa: Right. For example, if we are operating off these strong emotions and strong feelings, and the Holy Spirit is not in the picture, we might have a tendency to be judgmental, make snap decisions that are based solely on those feelings and emotions. We need to run it through the God Grid.
For example, meeting someone. Ed, you talk about how you have met people before.
Ed: Yes, I have met certain people, talked to them just for a little while and through conversation I have felt kind of a, “Warning, warning, alien approaching.” That was Lost in Space. But kind of a red flag or a check in my spirit. I will listen to that and many times it is the Holy Spirit of God saying to watch out for this person, be nice, love them, but keep your distance.
On the other hand, as I have checked it through that God Grid, I have said, “Ed, you are being a little hypersensitive. This person does have some pure motives and so forth.”
But I think going through the God Grid, going through Scripture, the Holy Spirit will never lead us to do something it does not talk about in Scripture. Also, the decisions that we make, women make so many decisions over the course of the day. I think it’s vital for women, when they come across those choices to be able to buy some time and to talk to other Christian ladies who can help them and give counsel in whatever they’re dealing with.
Lisa: If I were to make judgments based on feelings and emotions, often times, I could make a decision or a judgment based on feelings of anger or hurt. In a marriage context, if Ed and I have had a disagreement, say he leaves for work and the environment is not pristine, immediately because of anger or hurt, my mind starts playing out scenarios of how I can get back and how I can make him experience the same hurt and pain that I feel. That’s not good. That’s not healthy. That’s when the Holy Spirit is totally out of the picture. What I need to do is, through that God Grid, bring the Holy Spirit and say, “Holy Spirit, you check these feelings and emotions.”
Also, what if I have this wonderful stamp of intuition and I have strong feelings about a certain situation, but no one else buys into my intuition?
Ed: So you are saying, maybe I don’t have the same take on a situation because I don’t have the same intuition you have.
Lisa: I have a feeling and maybe either a boss or a co-worker or spouse doesn’t buy into my intuition. You have to be careful that rebellion doesn’t take place and become a part of your life, because other people aren’t adopting your sensitivity to a certain situation. Maybe we are mistaken. Maybe we are acting out of a feeling of anger or hurt.
For example, again in our relationship, Ed is a wonderful leader. He always asks me for my opinions on certain things.
Ed: Many times, I have changed my decision or where I am going to go because of Lisa’s insight. Many times.
Lisa: But when he does not, am I going to say, “Well, Ed, God stamped me with intuition and I have strong feelings about this. If you are a smart man, you are going to listen to this lady.”
No. I say, “Ed, I know we have talked about it and I trust your judgment.” Sometimes that comes a little faster than other times, but I try really hard.
Ed: In marriage, though, it is a form and function thing. In form, we are equal before God, male/female, Greek/Jew, white collar/pink collar, we are all the same. But in function, God has given the husband, the man, the leadership of the relationship. Biblical leadership, remember, starts with sacrifice and servanthood. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the church. Even in the dating relationship. There are a lot of singles here. The guy you are dating, ladies, should have that kind of affection towards you.
Lisa: But since, ladies, we have a tendency to get hyped out on feelings and emotions, doing the mood swing thing, and we are so emotionally based and feelings-driven, use the God Grid. Make sure that your behavior and everything pans out and sifts through what God would say through the Holy Spirit to us.
The Stamp of COMMUNITY
Ed: We could talk all day but time is running out. But with this next one, we are talking about some action now: Community. The word “communication” is in that one. Women have a longing for community. Lisa, scientific studies show that women speak an average of 14,000 more words a day than men. I have used up most of mine at the office. I come home and you are just getting revved up.
Lisa: Ed, God is a God of community. Women have this stamp of community in our lives, but it’s a reflection of the community that God provides for us because he is a God of community. If you go back to the first book in the Bible, the Book of Genesis, you see in the Garden of Eden that God created a place where he could dwell with Adam and Eve perfectly. There was no sin and they dwelt there together. Once sin entered the world, God provided another form of community with man and that was through the Old Testament sacrificial system. Then in the New Testament, through the ultimate sacrifice, his son, Jesus Christ. If we would accept him and invite Him into our hearts, we can have true community with God.
Then go to the book of Revelation, the final chapters, and this is like the most thrilling thing in the world for Christ followers, because in the very end, when God establishes that new heaven and new earth, he dwells there with us. The Bible tells us in the last chapters of Revelation that the glory of God is among his followers there in that place. It is so glorious and bright that there is no need for any other source of light. There is no need for sun or any other form of light, because God’s brilliance is dwelling right there among us. He has community with us from the beginning until the end. That just shows how he desires that community with you and I.
Think about women. How many of you are in a Ladies Night Out Program, a book club, a playgroup, Women’s Auxiliary? We are just wired to have relationships. When I go walking, I like to walk with my friend. We talk, talk, talk. I have to use up those words so that when Ed comes home, I don’t have quite so many left over. We go for a walk and talk and the time just passes by. It’s a lot more fun.
Ed: We (men) are more activity-driven, recreational. We just kind of communicate with grunts and groans and, “Hey, dude, nice shot. You just whacked that ball. Nice fish.”
Lisa: Women’s activities are more relationally based.
Ed: Yes, they are. When I say conversationally based, I think men have relational activities but we just don’t communicate like you do. Have you ever thought about the messages that women leave on voicemail compared to the messages that men leave? Think about it.
Guys, you leave the message, “Hey, my name is Bill. My number is 817-359-1400. Give me a call back. Thanks.”
A woman, “Hi, my name is Jill. And I was driving down the street, and today is a beautiful day, isn’t it, it’s incredible. I was having this feeling and I really wanted to talk to you. I’m not sure where you are. Did you fly out to L.A. today? I don’t know.” Then a cut-off sound.
The next message is, “Oh, I’m sorry. I got cut off…”
Get to the point! Say it!
Lisa: Obviously, we have more things to say.
Ed: You do. You do.
Lisa: Truly, we do have more things to say. If it is a scientific fact that women speak 14,000 more words a day than men, we have to ask, “What am I saying?” These words, are they just superfluous thoughts that are cast out there without thinking? What am I saying? Again, there is a checklist that we can go through kind of like a God Grid. What am I saying?
The first thing that we should be saying is a prayer to God, sharing our heart. We have all these words that we want to share with all these people but, first and foremost, our heart should be poured out before our Holy God. I should be praying to him and pouring my heart out.
There is a wonderful acrostic, Ed, that you have talked about before.
Ed: Yes, I came up with an acrostic that I did years ago when I did a series on prayer. I used the word “pray.” “P” stands for praise. Praise is basically saying, “God, you are God and I’m not.” It’s expressing our love and appreciation for him. “R” stands for repent.
Lisa: That’s basically telling God you’re a sinner, being honest about your condition. “God, I have really spoken some harsh words this week and I want to ask you to forgive me. I have made some poor choices. God, forgive me.” Be specific. Tell God the areas in which you need forgiveness.
Ed: “A” stands for ask, one of our favorites.
Lisa: Most people focus too much on the “ask” and forget the “PR.” But we ask God for things that we need or desire. The Bible tells us that God wants to know about the things of that nature. So we ask him for healing or whatever. “Y” is yield. That’s when you just say, “God, I am yours. Lead me. We should be talking to God and communicating with him. What a great use of our words.
The second thing we need to do is share our faith with others. We have already seen that we have these relationships. We live for relationships with other people. We are community stamped. Yet we are talking about everything but what God has done in our lives.
Ed: Lisa, the word “gospel” in the original language means “good news.”
Lisa: We should be sharing the life-changing message of what God has done for us. I should be telling my friends and other people, “You know what? This is what happened to me yesterday and I could just see God working in my life.” I should be honest and open about this relationship that I have with him.
Ed: Lisa, if we are praying those strategic high-risk prayers for people we rub shoulders with, God will give us the opportunity to share the good news.
Now, a lot of people are saying, “Well, I don’t know the Bible well enough. What can I say?”
All you have to do is tell them what your life was like before Christ, how you met Christ, and how he has changed your life. That is what we do when we share our faith.
Lisa: You know, Ed, I think a lot of people, and I am included in this, are intimidated because we think, “Gosh, these people really know me. They know that I am not perfect. They see my faults and weaknesses.” What a better opportunity to say, “What I came to understand is that I am a struggler. And God has forgiven me and I am going to continue to be a struggler. But he continues to forgive because I have that relationship with him and I am looking forward to how he is going to tweak and perfect my life the more I get to know him.” That kind of lets us off the hook a little bit. Not that we are going to give up on that perfection part. But it helps us.
The final way that we could be using our words is as encouragers. There is a beautiful passage of Scripture.
Ed: Yes, Proverbs 25. The great thing about it is that the Lord uses jewelry to communicate this to women, Lisa.
“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”
God knew that women would have this great gift of communication and community. He also knew that they would struggle with superfluous and words they shouldn’t concentrate on. So he said, “Speak strategically. If you do, it’s going to be like gold.”
Lisa: Ephesians 4:29 says, and this goes right along with being encouragers, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Take the opportunity to speak words of encouragement. I know in our home, because of whatever I’ve been dealing with that day, I may forget that when Ed comes through that door, there is something that I could say to him that would just fuel him through words of encouragement.
Ed: You know, after I speak, people are very kind. Sometimes they will send me emails saying they really enjoyed that, and that God spoke through me. That’s a great thing, and I enjoy compliments like we all do. But nothing puts wind in my sail like Lisa saying, “Honey, that was an outstanding message. God used you today.”
Lisa: This is something that just happened a few minutes ago, words of encouragement. We were getting ready to come out on stage and our twins, Laurie and Landra, are sitting down front. But they were backstage just a minute ago and, right as the video roll-in was coming, Landra said, “Dad, I love you. Mom, I love you.” Words of encouragement.
Ed: Lisa is incredible at this. She really has just a gift of saying the right things and being encouraging when sometimes others are moaning and down. It’s something to see what encouraging words will do, how they can change the course of someone’s day and someone’s life.
Lisa: But the problem is..
Lisa: How many of us really do all that? We are struggling, ladies, because you know what we are doing? We are gossiping, we’re slandering, using these words to tear people down. USA Today wrote an article just recently about teenage girls and how relationally based they are. They thrive on these relationships, but they know that the number one thing that they can do to get back at a friend who has maybe hurt them is to talk behind their back. It’s such a huge deal that now they are calling it, it has a clinical name, Relational Aggression. We have been labeled because we have this problem. It’s not just evident in the Christian community. It’s evident everywhere. Women have a problem because we are using words to tear down rather than build up.
Ed: For example, I am having a tough time talking today because, Tuesday, I had gum surgery. There is a periodontist, a great Christian guy, and you know you are getting old when you are older than the doctor. This guy is a young doctor and he did some gum surgery. Across my teeth, those are sutures. I have them hanging down. It’s kind of weird having strings in your mouth. But what he did was, it’s kind of gross but pretty much pain free, he …
Lisa: He was at home on codeine.
Ed: Yes. Codeine. But he actually cut my gums, peeled them back and shaved some bone, did stuff like that. I was thinking about that whole gum surgery thing because, a lot of women, your gums flap so much that I think you need to ask God, “Holy Spirit, sew my gums shut sometimes, before I get ready to gossip or slander someone, or rip someone apart or talk about junk, instead of good news and encouraging remarks, just sew it up.
Lisa: Share the verse about the …
Ed: Guys, this is classic.
Lisa: This is the get-even verse.
Ed: Yes, this is the get-even verse. Once I read this verse, you will say, “Ed has gotten even on the women.” Proverbs 27:15-16, “A nagging wife is as annoying as the constant dripping on a rainy day. Trying to stop her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or hold something with greased hands.” There you have it. The Lord has spoken.
Lisa: You know, what can we say? That’s true. It is true. But, this is the way it can be corrected. There are times when we have legitimate things and concerns and we need to speak the truth in love. But if we are constantly just bringing our negative things and critiquing and criticizing, then it is nagging. If I have a balance of encouraging words, speaking positively to my family and to my husband, then when I need to say something a little more difficult, speaking that truth in a difficult situation, Ed’s going to be less likely to see it as nagging when it is supported by all this encouragement.
Ed: It’s like the E.F. Hutton thing. Remember those commercials? “When E.F. Hutton talks, people listen.” When Lisa says something to me that is direct or a critique, I will do the E.F. Hutton thing and stop and listen.
Lisa: Only if, though, I have got that balance. But if you are constantly giving these little bites, that’s not good. The guy is going to see it as nagging and dripping water and a terrible thing.
There is a filter, another God Grid, that we can use in our conversation. That is one of my favorite verses, Psalm 19:14, “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”
Claim that verse. If you have to, write it on the dashboard of your car so that, right before you go into the hair salon, you pray that prayer. Right before you go to get your nails done, you pray that prayer. Right before you get out of the garage at the office, you pray that prayer. Right before your husband walks through the door, pray that prayer. Right before you go to a singles event, pray that prayer. So that when you get into these areas of conversation, your words will be pleasing to our Father.
Ed: Lisa, how about this. How about women and their friendships? How do you make relational choices that are beneficial and what would you say to the women here, because I get the sense, the intuition, that some of them are hooked up with people who are dragging them down regarding this whole community thing.
Lisa: Okay. Well, there are two passages of Scripture which tell me who I should have as my friends.
The first is Proverbs 22:24-25, “Keep away (and you can put your name in there) from angry, short-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.”
I take a look at my friends and, if they are people who are angry, want to gossip, talk bad, always see things negatively, then no.
Ed: Or maybe they are not seeking the Lord daily. They are not seeking him in the marriage.
Lisa: Their relationship with Christ is not a high priority. That’s not going to be my best friend. Yes, I will rub shoulders with them and pray for them.
Ed: “But, Lisa, they need me and I can help them and counsel them. I’ve known this person for a long time.”
Lisa: Well, that’s okay. The Bible says, though, that my best friends should not be those who bring me down but those who encourage me. It’s up to me to do the relational stoplight and say no to some people.
Ed: A good friend of mine told me a while back, “I wish my wife would install a relational stoplight.”
I said, “What do you mean by a relational stoplight?”
He said, “I feel like she is frozen up in these damaging relationships and the Lord is wanting her to go, he is giving her the green light. Yet, Satan is giving the red light.”
I truly believe, and my father taught me this years ago, that the evil one will put at least three to five people in every Christ-followers life who will completely suck the life out of them. We will waste most of our life trying to help them, and counsel them. All of that is fine and good for a while, but also you have got to disengage and move to more productive waters. Because you can waste your time with all these needy people, and miss the people that God wants you to meet.
Lisa: Does that mean that we don’t pray for them? That we don’t help them? No, that’s not what it means. But we have to make sure that our closest relationships are not red-light people but green-light people. That’s Proverbs 13:20, “Whoever walks with the wise will become wise; whoever walks with fools will suffer harm.”
I need to surround myself with people who will help me be positive, speak the right words and use that God Grid in understanding my conversation in relationships as it relates to community.
Ed: Let’s do one quick thing, Lisa. I think you are going to love this. For the men, we talked about initiative. Look at the balance. What a great God we serve. Men, we have initiative, women nurturing.
Lisa: Then we talked about intuition for women and loyalty for men. Community for women, competition for men.
Ed: Security for women and risk for men.
Lisa: These are the stamps that God has given men and women. It’s not something that pulls us apart, but when it is understood according to how God has designed us, it brings us together, so that we can have that wonderful relationship with Him understanding who He has made us to be.
Ed: These things are great stamps. They are good things because they are God things. There is one other thing that I want to add. Let me do a quick sidebar. A lot of us do a lot of fun things. A lot of us are into golf, tennis, and other activities. Usually those of us who are into golf or tennis, take lessons. Andre Aggassi, unbelievable tennis player, has a coach. Tiger Woods, probably the best golfer who has ever walked on the planet, has an instructor. The Bible says that we need counsel. I think many people here need a relational coach. Many people here need counseling. I’m talking about singles and those who are married.
Lisa: You can come to a series like this and say, “Wow, God stamped me in this way,” but maybe guys, your competition level is off the charts and it is not healthy. Maybe that sense of taking risk is not right. Ladies, maybe your feelings and emotions are out of whack and you need to get some help with that. There is nothing wrong with that. We live in a society today that sees counseling as wonderful. Thirty years ago, you talk about going to see somebody for help, that was taboo. But now we live in an age where it is actually vogue.
Ed: Guys out there are still saying, “I’m not going to go to a counselor. I can take care of my own stuff. I’m not going to do that. I’ll go and somebody will tell me my diapers were put on too tight.”
Lisa: That’s totally off base.
Ed: I say get over it. We need Christian counseling. We are not talking about just counseling or psychobabble stuff. What are we talking about?
Lisa: We are talking about counselors where everything is tethered to the Bible and that relationship with Jesus Christ. There are some wonderful counselors that we have posted on the Internet at www.fellowshipchurch.com.
Ed: Just type in keyword “counsel” or go to Programs and they are right there for you. I’ll tell you something. I have been seeing a counselor for a while and this guy has helped me with so many areas of my life. If I will go, come on, guys. You need to go as well. Many ladies need to go.
Lisa: The secret here is just understanding that God has made you so very special. But because we live in a fallen world, we are not always going to live out what he wants us to do. So, through understanding what the Bible says about our relationship with him, and through the help of a Christian counselor or further study, we can understand that God has made us very special.
Ed: So, it is great that we are men and women.