Description
JUST LUST
Prime Time Porn
Ed Young
September 7, 2003
Guys, I have a question for you. And ladies, I’m sure you will want to know the answer to this question. Here’s the question for the guys. Why do naked women look so good? [Laughter] Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it. I mean, come on. Why do they look so good? It’s because we rarely see them that way. [Laughter] That would be one reason. Another reason is because men like to see things that are hidden from them. Nakedness, though, is deeper than just being disrobed. Nakedness reveals an intimacy, a trust, and an openness that words can’t really describe. That’s why God wants us to get naked in his context. That’s why nakedness is reserved for a man and a woman who are in the lifelong covenant of marriage.
Think back to the book of Genesis 2:25. The verse says, “The man and his wife (Adam and Eve) were both naked, and they felt no shame.” They weren’t freaked out about it. This nakedness mirrored a deeper nakedness that they had with one another and with God. If you read the rest of the story, you find that Adam and Eve sinned. The first sin was the lust of the eyes. Because of their sin, Scripture records, they felt ashamed and they tried to cover their nakedness. In essence, their sin, the sin of lust, stripped the significance of nakedness and from that day forward we have been struggling with lust. We have taken nakedness out of its context. Little did Adam and Eve realize, but an entire industry would be based and birthed on nakedness. I am speaking of pornography. Pornography has gone prime time in today’s world.
When I say the word “pornography,” what do you think about? Let’s start with the definition, because I am going to talk about pornography over the next several moments. Here’s what Webster says, “It’s a depiction of an erotic behavior, as in pictures or writing, intended to cause sexual excitement.” It’s a depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction. That’s pornography.
In 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, the Bible talks about pornography.
You may be thinking, “Say what?! You mean the Bible mentions porn?”
Yes, it does. [The verse reads] “It’s God’s will that you should avoid sexual immorality.” Remember that phrase, “sexual immorality”. “Each of you,” it says in verse 4, “should learn to control his or her own bodies in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.”
Sexual immorality. What’s up with sexual immorality? What’s that? Sexual immorality comes from a Greek word “pornea.” We get the word “pornography” from it. It means anything sexual that is outside the marriage bed. That is sexual immorality — homosexuality is sexual immorality; adultery is sexual immorality; fornication is sexual immorality; bestiality is sexual immorality. The Bible says we should avoid sexual immorality, the pornea. We are to stay away from it.
As I said a second ago, pornography has gone prime time. It’s gone main stream. It has infiltrated everything we see and everything we come in contact with. How did this happen? What’s the deal?
Enter Steve Hirsch, a 41-year-old executive, a multi-multi-millionaire who owns Vivid Entertainment. Hirsch is the guy solely responsible for taking a very disreputable business, pornography, and pumping it into the main stream. Steve Hirsch and Vivid Entertainment have taken pornography and they have put it in prime time. They are the ones who have poured it into television sets across the land. They are the ones who hooked up with satellite and cable operators like Comcast, Direct TV, and AOL/Time Warner. They are the ones who hooked up with Marriott and Hilton Hotel chains. They are the ones who have taken unknown strippers and models and made them into multi-multi-millionaires. Steve Hirsch and his company are at the cutting edge of technology and it’s their desire to have porn piped into our cell phones. It’s their desire for people to be able to access porn whether you are in a restaurant, an airport or even on a battlefield in some far away land. That is their mission.
I’m not sure you realize it, but this message and this service will be broadcast all over the world in several months. You can watch Fellowship Church anywhere in the world, except in Antarctica. I want to look in that camera right now and say something to Steve Hirsch. [Ed looks directly into one of the television cameras] First of all, Steve Hirsch is a very talented young guy. Steve, you matter to God, but I am going to tell you something in love. You are missing the greatness that God has for you. You will never, ever discover the ultimate for your life until you bow the knee to Christ and allow him to show you what true desire and true purpose is all about. [Ed speaks to the present audience again] I don’t care where you are in your life. I don’t care how far you are entrenched in pornography. I don’t care if you are in the skin business. I don’t care if you are consumed by pornography. There is hope for you.
We are going to talk about pornography in a very raw and uncensored manner, because we are going to expose (no pun intended) pornography for what it is.
PORNOGRAPHY STATISTICS
You might want to jot this down. I’m going to give you three prime time facts about pornography. While you are finding a pen or a pencil, just consider this. Four out of ten keyword searches on the Internet are all about pornography. In 2002, there were over 11,000 hardcore films produced compared to only 470 feature films in Hollywood. Pornography is a ten billion dollar a year industry. Many experts say that pornography drives all of the new technology. So, again, it’s prime time.
PORNOGRAPHY WILL RULE YOUR WORLD
Let’s go to prime time fact number one. Pornography will rule, dominate and control your life. I’ve had the privilege of talking to a lot of people over the years who have dealt with a lot of things. I’ve talked with many men and women who have been immersed in pornography. I’ve never heard one of them say, “You know Ed, when I started dabbling in porn, when I started recreational lusting, I said to myself, ‘You know what? I’m going to build my life around this stuff. I’m going to spend tens to thousands of dollars on it. I’m going to ruin my marriage, my family and I’m going to toss my career aside. I am going to be addicted to porn.’”
No one has ever told me that. Pornography is addictive, friends. It’s progressive. It always screams for more and more. The thrill and chill that satisfied you yesterday will not satisfy you today. Pornography is progressive.
Ephesians 4:19 reads, “Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality.”
Steve Hirsch and his associates have given themselves over to sensuality. Many people who are hearing my voice right now have given themselves over to sensuality.
[The verse continues] “So as to indulge in every kind of impurity with a continual lust for more.”
That’s what porn says, “More and more and more.” Steve Hirsch told Business 2.0 magazine this, “Not only does hardcore pornography not shock people today, but I think they want more – harder and harder and harder and harder.” This is from the mastermind of all the mayhem we see in the pornography industry.
When Jesus was dying on the cross for your sins and mine, what did he say to those people who were pounding the nails into his flesh? He said, “Father, forgive them. They don’t know what they are doing.” Steve Hirsch doesn’t know what he is doing. The people who peddle porn don’t know what they are doing. The people in the entertainment industry and other genres don’t know what they are doing. Pornography will dominate, control and rule your life. That’s the first prime time fact.
PORNOGRAPHY GIVES THE ILLUSION OF INTIMACY
The second prime time fact about porn is this. Pornography is all about illusion. Specifically, it is all about the illusion of intimacy. Pornography says, “Yeah, you can feel and experience intimacy.” That’s a lie. That’s not true. What does pornography do? Pornography strips sex and nakedness of its significance. It takes sex out of context. Most of pornography is leveled toward men. However, if you read the stats, more and more women are being involved in it as well.
Pornography is basically all about fantasy and masturbation. What’s masturbation? It’s having sex with yourself. It’s very lazy to be involved in pornography. You don’t have to work on a relationship. You don’t have to risk anything. There’s no communication. There’s no operating from the same page. There’s no unselfishness. It’s just, “I will satisfy myself. I will take sex out of context, because it should be for the marriage bed period, and I will have sex with myself.” Pornography is also very selfish. You show me someone who is ruled by pornography and I will show you somebody who is [Ed sings the cheer] “U-G-L-Y, you ain’t got no alibi,” selfish. Masturbation is having sex with yourself, what makes you feel good, what gives you pleasure. Pornography — it’s so tempting for men.
Men think, “I don’t have to work. I just make myself feel good and all these airbrushed images are available 24/7, always willing, always smiling, and always there.”
That’s unrealistic. It’s totally bogus — the illusion of intimacy. Al Mower, a theologian, said this about pornography. “Men are tempted to give themselves to pornography. Women though are tempted to commit pornography.”
So men, we are tempted to give ourselves to pornography and women are tempted to commit pornography. Ladies can commit it by the way they dress and by the way they act. Ladies, if you dress and act just to excite men sexually, you are committing pornography with your life. So don’t think, “Well, it’s not about me, you know. It’s only a man’s deal.” No, this is a woman’s deal as well. It gives us this illusion of intimacy.
If you study pornography, you will see something underlying. You will see something subterranean called the “rape myth.” Porn says, “When a woman says no, she really means yes.” Porn says, “Women are just looking for sexual conquest all day and all night.” Take someone who is addicted to pornography, who is a little bit whacked, and you’ll find that they are a walking time bomb. And you ask why we have so many sexual crimes? It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that one, does it?
Porn is addictive. It will dominate and rule your life. That’s a prime time fact. Number two — porn is all about the illusion of intimacy. It uses our sexuality but it does not satisfy us sexually.
PORNOGRAPHY RUINS RELATIONSHIPS
The third prime time fact is that pornography ruins and devastates relationships. I cannot tell you how many marriages I have seen ruined by pornography. It starts out so innocently. That is what the Evil One does. He loves to gradually push us into it. A man and woman are married. Their sex life is a little blasé. So they invite pornography into the bedroom. For a while, it gives them some thrills and chills, then there is more and more. It’s progressive. Other parties are introduced and then this deviant behavior, that deviant behavior, then affairs, then jealousy, then sex is just an athletic event, and then you have to call the lawyers in to pick up the pieces.
PORNOGRAPHY DESTROYS CHILDREN
Pornography also destroys children. If I asked for a show of hands here, and I will not, but if I asked for a show of hands to find specifically when and where you were exposed to pornography, 90% of you would raise your hand to, “In my family of origin.” Because porn inevitably falls into the hands of little ones. Look at Steve Hirsch, this 41-year-old multi-multi-millionaire, who owns Vivid Entertainment. Read about his life in Business 2.0 magazine. Do you know where he was first exposed to porn? His father peddled porn. He has childhood memories of porn, teenage memories of porn, and college memories of porn. Now he is the king and he is peddling it all over the world.
Jesus said this in Matthew 18:6, “But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”
Parents, let me say a word to you. What you allow your children to watch baffles me. It stuns me. Too many parents today are allowing pornography in the home – allowing your children to watch pornography like the MTV Music Awards with Madonna French-kissing Britney Spears. That’s pornography. Ja Rule, Snoop Dog – pornography. What else is it? Are you that numbed out that you don’t see it? Tell me you are smarter than that, please, parents. I mean, it scares me. The movies you allow your kids to watch — pornography. What is in their MP3 players? What kind of CDs do you own? Pornography. Pornography, illicit sexual behavior, glorifying sex outside the marriage bed. We have got to wake up and smell the espresso!
The Bible never says, parents, that we are to be our kids’ buddies or friends. That’s the problem with most parents. They say, “Oh, I don’t want to make them upset. You know they might come back at me.” Well, you know what? It’s time for a lot of you to be a man, to be a woman, to be a father, to be a mother, to draw a line in the sand and say, “We are not going to cross the line.” Why do you do that? Why do you draw that line? Is it because of negativity? Is it because you are going to try to stifle someone’s sexual parade? No. You know why you do it?
God, listen to me very carefully, God never tells us to sacrifice as an end to itself. Never. When we are told to sacrifice, there is always a greater potential, a greater victory, a greater agenda, a greater purpose behind this sacrifice. We don’t get that. That’s why the Evil One has such a grip and grasp on lust. There is no sin like sexual sin. Sexual sin is multi-faceted and multi-dimensional. One of the reasons that so many of you never experience the presence and power of God is because of sexual sin. It’s not going to happen for you if you are involved in sexual sin. This is what the Bible says. Forget me. This is what Scripture says. You are not going to be able to worship. You are not going to be able to know true community. You are not going to be able to share your faith. You are not going to be able to use your spiritual gifts. It’s not going to happen. But I’m telling you that there is hope. There is a God out there who forgives and who changes us. He can take whatever we are involved in and with, deal with it, and remold us and remake us into something beautiful.
Let me do one more caveat and it pains me to say it, but I’ve got to say it. This is not a fun message to talk about, believe me. I did not want to come up here but I’ve got to. Talking about ruining relationships, pornography causes adults to molest children. There is no doubt about that one. You can roll your eyes and say, “Well, hey.” There are over 100,000 illegal child porn websites on the Internet right now. Child pornography is a three billion dollar industry, friends. Three billion dollars! Pornography always screams for more and more and more.
A friend of mine who is one of the founding members of Fellowship Church is a federal judge. He told me several years ago, “Ed, out of all the child molesters who have been through my court, I’ve never seen one who is not addicted to pornography.” He said, “Where you have pornography, and specifically child porn, you have molestation.”
Ted Bundy, the famed serial killer who slaughtered 28 women and children, said that every person he met on death row had an addiction to pornography.
What did Jesus say? I’ve said this verse over and over again, John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.” That’s Satan’s agenda. That’s his mission statement. But Jesus said in the same verse, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
The reason there is such a battle for sex in our world today is because Satan sees the potential in your life and mine. He wants to keep us numbed out. He wants us to have a low grade awareness of where we are instead of allowing the Lord fully liberate us and free us up to discover the greatness that God has.
Maybe you are saying, “Ed, I am imprisoned by pornography. I am one of the people who frequent skin clubs and I watch this or that,” or, “I am out of control with my kids. What should I do?”
All I can tell you what to do is from Scripture. Here is what Scripture says in Colossians 3:5, “Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.” Put it to death. What does that mean? Kill it.
Do you know what? I can’t do that. I’ll just be honest with you. After all, we are at church. I can’t do it and you can’t, either, because we are sinners. I don’t have enough strength and you don’t have enough strength. It’s got to be a God thing. God is the only one who can take care of lust. We can’t have enough discipline or enough willpower. It’s too strong. We can’t do it by ourselves. But God can.
KILL THE LIZARD
Let me tell you a little story from C.S. Lewis. C.S. Lewis wrote a story one time in which there was a red lizard that represented lust. This red lizard sat on the shoulder of a ghostly creature that kind of looked like a man. This man loved the red lizard because the red lizard would whisper lustful lies and seductive secrets into his ear day and night. This guy liked the lustful lizard. He made a pet out of it. He felt guilty, though, and shackled by shame when he would mess up.
An angel appeared to him and said, “Hey, I’ll break the back of this lizard for you. I’ll kill that lizard.” The guy thought about it and he said, “Well, I like the lizard, sorry.” And the angel bolted. After more and more torment, the guy, with tears streaming down his face, said, “Angel, come back! I’m ready for you to kill the lizard.” He handed the lizard, the most difficult thing he ever did, to the angel. The angel took the lizard and broke its back. The moment that happened, Lewis writes, this ghost-like creature turned into a handsome man and the red lizard was transformed into a beautiful white stallion. This handsome man jumped on the back of the white stallion and they soared off into the clouds.
You see, friends, the end and the death of desire is not really the end and the death of desire. It’s really the beginning of greatness and true desire that God has for all of us. Isn’t that great? That’s how wonderful our God is! So, if we have the guts to give God this red lizard of lust, he will break its back, and it will turn into a white stallion. We think, “Oh no, our desire is over. The thrills and chills are gone.” But God is saying, “Hey, you are just beginning to pursue the ultimate that I have for you.” Kill the red lizard of lust. Give it to God. He wants to break its back. But he can’t force you to do it. It’s got to be your call.
Ephesians 5:3 reads, “Among you there must not even be a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.”
A hint turns into a habit. And with a habit, you always have hurt and harm. You might be saying, “Ed, that’s cool. Break the back of the red lizard. Good story, man. C.S. Lewis is pretty brilliant. But what does that mean? How do you do that?”
COME CLEAN
Well, I’m glad you are asking that. Three quick things. Here is how to break the back of the red lizard of lust. Number one – drag lust into the light. Come clean with it. What have we been saying during this entire series? Lust has the most leverage in our lives when we keep it secret.
Too many people think, “Wow, if I told anybody what I really deal with, if I told anybody the shame of my thought life, where I go and what I do, they would reject me so I just keep it to myself.”
When we have that mentality, lust has the most power. The moment though we drag it into the light, the moment we say, “Jesus, break the back of the red lizard of lust,” and the moment we share our struggle with a friend or a Christian counselor to hold us accountable, then we can have victory. It’s got to be a God thing. That’s why we have HomeTeams here at Fellowship Church. That’s why we have small groups. It’s so you can meet other people to hold you accountable. Come clean before God and someone else who will hold you accountable. Come clean.
KNOW YOUR COMPANIONS
Here’s another thing I want you to do. Know who you run with, know your companions.
Proverbs 13:20 reads, “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”
Think about who you run with. I’m not just talking about your friends, but who do you put into your mind? Who do you run with? Who do you do life with? Musically, your entertainment choices, and the stuff you read — does it feed lust or does it feed the lordship of Jesus Christ?
MAKE AN EXCHANGE
The third thing we need to do to break the back of the red lizard of lust is that we need to make an exchange. The moment I became a Christ-follower, an exchange took place in my life. All of my sin, all of my junk was transferred to Christ’s life, and all of his grace, mercy and forgiveness was transferred into my life. So, a big exchange took place. We need to exchange lies for truth. We need to put truth into the slot of all the lies. That red lizard is sitting on your shoulder right now, sir, right now, ma’am, whispering a bunch of bunk to you. I know it, because it’s that powerful. The Evil One does not want you to give the red lizard to Christ. He doesn’t want you to do it. He wants you to think about the Cowboys game. He wants you to think about what you are going to do next week. He wants you to think about the person to your right or to your left. He does not want you to give it to Christ. Why? Because the stakes are sky high, and for many of you, they are eternally sky high.
What are some lies that the red lizard whispers to us? I’m glad you ask, because here are some of them.
Lie: “Hey, it’s no big deal to surf those websites. A little bit of porn is not going to mess you up.”
Replace that with truth. Job 31 says, “For that (talking about lust), would have been shameful, a sin to be judged. It is the fire that burns to Destruction; it would have uprooted my harvest.”
Look at the next lie. “I love fantasizing and it’s not going to hurt anybody.” The lizard says, “You love fantasizing and it’s not going to mess you up.”
Look at the truth. Put the truth in. “The mind of a simple man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace,” Romans 8:6 says.
Here’s another lie. “Hey, don’t be so radical about the action you need to take about pornography. It’s not necessary. Don’t be listening to what Ed says from the Bible. He’s kind of going off track here. Don’t be so radical.”
Replace that junk with truth. 2 Timothy 2:22 says, “Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.”
Here’s another lie. This is a popular one. “It’s my body. I can do what I want to do.”
Look at the truth. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 reads, “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”
You don’t have the right to lust. I don’t have the right to lust. You don’t have the right to look at pornography. I don’t have the right to look at pornography. Why? Because I don’t own Ed. Christ does. You don’t own you. Jesus does. Isn’t that great?
John Piper, a noted intellectual and author wrote, “The fire of lust’s pleasure is to be fought with the fire of God’s pleasures.” You see, Jesus didn’t just die to save us from our sins. He didn’t stop there. He also died to save us for life. Do you know life?
Give the red lizard to the Lord. Let him break his back. You will discover who you are, uniquely, and then you can climb aboard that stallion and soar.