Description
COOL-AID
The Regularity of Vulgarity
June 10, 2012
Ed Young
The term ‘society’ assumes a certain level of decorum. To be civilized requires a platform of respect, a mentality of manners. Yet, in today’s world, vulgarity is everywhere we turn.
In this message, Ed Young reminds us of the power our words have. He shows us how God’s plan for language and behavior is far from what we see in the media or hear on the street. And we learn what it takes to use our words to build life into others, rather than using them to destroy or demean.
TRANSCRIPT
<video> I’m driving to a party right now and there are gonna be a lot of people at this place who are far away from God. In fact, I would probably say that I’ll be the only Christ-follower there in a room of about 80 people. Every time I go to a place like this I try to just say a prayer to God, “God, use me as a light. Use me as a beacon. Use me the way you want me to be used. And as people open doors, give me the words to say, as I talk to them the way you want me to talk to them. I know I’m gonna have a lot of people telling me the typical jokes they tell me all the time about religion and pastors.
People either will watch their language, they’ll either apologize when they say something off-color, or they sometimes tell me off-color jokes just to get my reaction.
Today, though, I thought I’d do something interesting. Today I thought I would count how many cuss words that people say. I think it will be pretty interesting. How many cuss words and off-color jokes will I hear?
Well, I’m at the party, I’m at the place. I don’t want to show you where it is but I am at the party. I will talk to you in about an hour and a half, two hours, about how everything went. It’ll be fun, but also very interesting. How many cuss words, how many vulgar stories did I hear? I’m gonna count… tonight!
TWO HOURS LATER….
Well, it’s about time for bed. The party was fun. I had a lot of interesting conversations, a lot of great conversations. I think I counted 47, something like that, don’t hold me to it, vulgar terms or stories. So, I have to wonder why do so many people want to use language like that? I don’t know. But today we’re gonna talk about that. We’re gonna talk about vulgarity. I think it’s a message everyone needs. Let’s hear it right now. Goodnight.
<End of video>
I’m in a series called Cool-Aid. Isn’t it true when we say the phrase, “Drink the Kool-Aid” we go back to maniac Jim Jones who made his followers drink the Kool-Aid, laced with poison, that killed everyone. I think it’s real to parallel that phrase, drinking the Cool-Aid, with where we are today as a culture.
Many of us have Cool-Aid moustaches. We’ve been drinking the Cool-Aid of our culture that has been laced with the toxin of vulgarity. We slurp it, we guzzle it, we sip it without even really thinking about it. I think all of us can say, “Yeah, I’ve sipped, I’ve guzzled the Cool-Aid. I’ve got a Cool-Aid moustache.”
When it comes to vulgarity, though, we’ve got to be totally honest. It’s something that’s really vogue these days. Vulgarity used to be known as maybe an expletive. Now vulgarity is an adjective and even an adverb. It’s moved from just an emotional outburst to the mainstream of our conversations. Vulgarity is accepted, even celebrated, in so many genres of life.
Think about the music industry. Think about the entertainment industry. Think about what’s on television. Think about what’s online. Think about Facebook pictures. Think about the words that we say. Vulgarity is in vogue.
Do you have a vocabulary of vulgarity? Do you have this vocabulary that is dirty? That’s off-color? That’s not really square? Why do we have this tendency for vulgarity. Why do we even know that something is off-color or not. Have you ever thought about that?
We’re made in the image of God. The Bible says we’re tailor-made, custom-made in his likeness. Even though our behavior has disqualified us from a relationship with God, and that behavior is known as sin. Sin is an archery term. Everybody… I will say it again… every single person on planet Earth knows that what they’re saying or what they’re involved in is either right or wrong. Where do we get that from? It comes from God.
Scientists can’t explain it. Psychiatrists can’t explain it. Sociologists or archeologists can’t really give us the 4-1-1 on why we have a conscience. Yet we do. The most spectacular sinner in the world has some sort of a conscience. It comes from God. I would argue that when we use vulgar terms or innuendos we know down deep, wow. I’ve committed cosmic treason. God is holy. He’s righteous, he’s pure. We’re made in his image. We have this God-consciousness, whether we want to articulate it or not. So when we hear something or we say something we know, we know down deep (Romans, chapter 1) that I’ve violate this directive from the Lord.
The idea for this talk on vulgarity came out of a conversation I had a couple of weeks ago. A friend of mine (who is 40 years old) and I were talking. He asked me a question that a lot of people ask me, who are not followers of Christ. He said,
“Ed, what’s the difference between the other world religions and your faith? What’s the difference between Christianity, Buddhism, Islam, Mormonism, Hinduism, etc.” I said,
“You know, I’ll send you some good books on the subject if you really want to get detailed but bottom line, what you’ll come to is this.” Cause I’m kind of a bottom-line guy. “World religions are performance-based. I’ve got to do this or I can’t do that. And somehow if I do certain things, at the end of my life, when I clock out then maybe, just maybe, I will have appeased God (whoever that God is) and maybe, just maybe, I will get into the afterlife. That’s basically what world religions stand for. They’re religious. I’ve got to do certain things or maybe I don’t do certain things. Keep a list and if I do more good than bad, somehow, maybe God will let me get into the afterlife. That’s in essence what the other world religions are about.
“Christianity, though,” I said, “is totally different. It separates itself from the pack because Christianity is not a religion. I will say it again. Christianity is not a religion, it’s a relationship. Our behavior has disqualified us from God. For example, I am a sinner. I’m not perfect. I mess up. I’ve fumbled the ball. I’ve committed moral turnovers.”
And he goes, “Well, so have I.” And I said,
“Here’s the deal. Our behavior has disqualified us from a relationship with God. So even after my best sermon or my best book or my best run at speaking different placed I STILL am a self-centered sinner. I’m still disqualified from entering into Heaven. Because God is holy, he’s righteous, I’m not.” And he goes,
“Wow. I will never hit the mark.” And I said,
“Nor will I.” Then there was kind of a long pause, a pregnant pause. Then I said.
“Here’s what God did, though. God loved the world so much that he sent Jesus Christ to live this righteous life. He performed perfectly, died sacrificially, rose bodily, thereby affording us an opportunity to get to God through Christ.” So I said, “It’s a relationship thing.”
I said, “You’re married.” He goes,
“Yeah.”
“That’s a commitment, it’s a time where you said, ‘I do’ before God and several witnesses. And that constituted your relationship with your wife. You’re committed to her. Jesus has put it all on the table. We either receive that or not. So he hit the mark. We can’t hit the mark. We receive that, then we’re believers.” So from there I said,
“You might be wondering. Why do I live a holy life? I’m not totally righteous, I’m not holy all the time. I’m still a sinner, but why do I talk purely? Why do I stay faithful to my wife of 30 years? Why do I do the things I do? It’s not some legalistic trip. It’s based on a relationship. It’s based on honor. Honor.”
So when I talk about vulgarity, I’m not talking about some external stuff. “Oh, I better clean up my language. I better erase all of this from my lap. I’ve got to delete these channels.” That’s just external stuff! What I’m talking about, what I’m driving at is this love that emerges from a relationship. We want to honor God because he’s so honored us. Those of us who are married, are we gonna trash our spouse’s name? Are we gonna drag our spouse’s name through the mud? No way!
A couple of summers ago, I think I told you this, I rescued a guy from drowning. He was literally minutes from sinking into the Atlantic Ocean. I was in a small boat, a 16’ boat, with a friend of mine. We drug this guy in the boat. Saved his life. It was emotional for him. My friend and I, we were like, I can’t believe it! I ask you, would this guy trash my name or my friend’s name? Would he abuse us? Would he use our name in a vulgar way? Are you kidding me? We saved his life! We rescued him!
Yet so many who are sipping the Cool-Aid, who are guzzling the Cool-Aid, are trampling the grace and the mercy of God.
So I told my friend, “That is why my language, for example, is different.” And then I thought hey! It’s like the Holy Spirit of God said, “Ed, why don’t you talk about this? Why don’t you talk about the regularity of vulgarity? See that’s why we’re talking about this today. I thought you’d want to know. Inquiring minds want to know!
Matthew 15:18, here’s what Jesus said. This is deep. This issues is not just external. “Oh, don’t cuss. Or don’t tell any off-color jokes.” Listen to this.
“But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart. The things that come out of the mouth come from the heart.” Whenever you hear someone in any slice of life talking in a vulgar way, it’s coming from where? Where? At all the campuses, where? The heart! It’s a marker indicator of where a person is. Our words are powerful. Our words set the course, set the die for our lives. You can meet someone at a party. You can talk to someone at work, around your complex, neighborhood, health club, wherever, golf course, and you can tell by what they’re talking about, what they say, the words they use. You can tell what kind of person they are. It’s the first indicator of who a person is.
So, if I talk in a negative way, a vulgar way, it’s a predictor of the future. In other words, we can take every word that you’ve said and I’ve said and put it on this monstrous screen. And we could scroll through it. That’d be pretty interesting, wouldn’t it? For the last seven days, every word that we’ve said. And we could sit and tell through observation where I’m gonna be, where you’re gonna be, in the next 10 years. That’s how powerful words are. You words set the die, set the course, for your life. Are you heading towards true north?
Some of you might be going, “Well, my kids are here and they might get pretty explicit, pretty raw during the next several minutes. I don’t want their little ears to be exposed to this.” Parents, please wake up. What are you drinking? What are you slurping? What are you guzzling? Our kids have heard it. Numerous, numerous time. It’s a heart issue. If my heart is right before God I’m gonna honor him with the words that I say. Our words are the greatest predictor of the future that we know of. And it’s stunning to me that the people who know God the least use his name the most. Are you sucked into the vortex of vulgarity.
You know, so many comedians, male and female comedians, their acts would be chopped from maybe an hour to about two minutes if you cut vulgarity from their whole vibe. Have you ever thought about that? Some of the musicians out there, some of the artists out there, maybe they could get one song if you cut vulgarity out of what they sing about.
Isn’t it hilarious how many artists have an edited version, a clean version, of their songs. Even they know… even they know. I’m telling you, we’re slurping the Cool-Aid. It’s been spiked with vulgarity. Garbage in, garbage out. It’s time to take out the garbage. Again, not an external thing, an internal thing. Out of the hearts! Out of the heart. Where’s your heart? Where’s your heart?
Well I decided to do something. Let me change gears for a second. I decided, because we have so many people in so many environments, watching us online, at our different campuses, those who will watch this by television around the world. I thought about this. There are different categories of vulgarity.
Let me, if you’ll be patient with me, describe these categories of vulgarity. Because many people fall into these categories. I hate to label it but let’s just do it. I’ve been around some of the most spectacular swearers in the world. People think,
“Oh, you don’t know, Ed, what’s going on.” Hey, sin is my business. I do. I do. But let’s talk about some of these areas, some of these lines of vulgarity. The first person that I want to describe when I think about the vocabulary of vulgarity is the person who is clueless. They just don’t think about what they’re saying. We know people like that. You know people like that.
“That girl doesn’t think. He just says stuff. He doesn’t even realize what he’s saying.” There are people out there who are clueless when it comes to vulgarity. I know them, so do you. And we’re not here to judge anybody, we’re just here to observe. God is the judge. We do know, though, what comes out of the mouth comes from where? The heart. They’ve got a heart issue. If you hear somebody, I don’t care if they’re clueless or not, talking in off-color and profane ways, they’ve got a heart issue.
Luke 11, you know what Jesus said? He taught his boys, the disciples, how to pray. He said, “Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.” The name of God is hallowed. It should be honored. The name of God. The Bible says in Exodus 20:7, “Don’t take God’s name in vain.” The word vain means don’t empty it of its content. Don’t (we would say) decaffeinate it. The name of God. A Jew, back in the day, wouldn’t even pronounce the name of God. That’s how holy the name of God is. Some people are clueless about it. So I thought I would just go through some very, very popular vulgar words right now. And let me define them and use them. And I think it might change your view on what people say, especially those who are clueless here. Surely we don’t have anybody in that category.
Here’s the first one. Are you ready for it? Are you ready?
“What in the sexual intercourse are you doing?!”
“Dude, that’s some crazy feces.”
“Man, I’m urinated off at him! I don’t know about you but I am URINATED!”
We got some clueless people here. I can tell right now.
“You gotta go to summer school? Man, that’s oral sex.” You gotta think. See you’re clueless. You didn’t get that.
“God, send that driver to an eternal punishment in Hell.” See, when you say ‘God damn it,’ you’re asking God, you’re telling God, the creature is telling the Creator to do something he doesn’t do. God does not hurl anybody to Hell. We make that choice. Clueless, man. Clueless
“That girl is an offspring of a female dog!”
“Shut the eternal separation from God up!” Is this ridiculous? It’s absolutely vulgar. We’re sucked into the vortex of vulgarity. We’re drinking the Cool-Aid laced with poison and we don’t even know it.
Proverbs 18:20-21, “From the fruit of his mouth a man’s stomach is filled, with the harvest from his lips he is satisfied. Words steer the course of our lives. Encouraging words, uplifting words, challenging words, exciting words, they’re like health food, man. Fruit! It’s good for you!
Vulgar words, off-color words, swear words, dirty stories, stuff we watch and listen to, and bombard our minds with, they’re not healthy for us. See, God has our best interest in mind. Words are powerful! Words set the course. What are you doing with your words? That five-ounce slab of muscle, covered with mucous membrane, the tongue. It’s petite, powerful. I can tell so much about a person, you can tell so much about me, by the words that we use.
The tongue has the power of life and death. We can speak life or death… to our kids. Life or death to our co-workers. Life or death to our students. Life or death to our spouse. The tongue has the power of life or death and those who love it will eat of its fruit.
It’s kinda like fuel. You’ve gotta put the right fuel in the right place with the right car. God says, “I’m telling you. Put the fuel of life, put the fuel of worshipful words, and your car will cruise down the course, down the Autobahn. I will say it for you. Yes, some of us here are clueless. It’s time to get clued in to what we’re saying.
Another category would be those who are capricious. What does the word capricious mean? I like that word. It’s a sudden behavioral change. All of a sudden I’m just rolling down the freeway and the wheels go off. Someone cuts me off in the church parking lot and I flip them off. Someone says something I don’t like I’m all over them. The wheels come off. Wheels on, wheels off. We’re just capricious. You never know what’s gonna happen! We just go off on people! Wow! Anybody here in that realm? No hands, please, please, please. No hands are raised, but I’m saying is that convicting? The capricious. Those who use vulgarity in just a capricious manner.
“All of a sudden, man, I like this girl. This girl seems like she has it together but then all of a sudden, BOOM!”
“Yeah, he’s cool. I was shocked at his reaction just like, that! What came out of his mouth was just… whoo! Poison! Toxic Cool-Aid!”
James 3: 9-10, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father…” Why do we take God’s name? Why do we say God, damn, but we never say Buddha, damn! Muhammad, damn! They’re not God. Simply put, they’re not God. They’re not.
“Yeah, but there are a lot of sincere people in the world.” You can be sincerely wrong! Jim Jones’ followers sincerely sipped Kool-Aid laced with poison. They sincerely died. I could sincerely say,
“I believe true north is that way… or maybe that way!” Well, true north is true north. And God says, words are powerful. I’ve got a true north for you. I’ve got a course for you.
“With the tongue we praise our Lord and yet with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.”
So, maybe you feel like you’re capricious. It’s time to put the wheels on. The wheels are off, it’s time to put the wheels on. Maybe instead of using vulgar terms and all these crazy words, just do what the Turtle Man does. Have you heard the Turtle Man, seen the Turtle Man? He, man, he takes a big alligator snapper… Ye-yay!!! Let’s do it together… 1… 2…3… Ye-Yay! At all the campuses… “ye-Yay!” Maybe that’s the word now, something happens, “Ye-Yay!” Somebody cuts you off in traffic, “Ye-Yay!” Somebody says something at work you don’t like, “Ye-Yay!” You’re really mad at your spouse, “Ye-Yay!”
That’s pretty funny.
The Bible says in Romans 12:2 we can be transformed by the renewing of our minds. In our book, The Sexperiment, Lisa and I talk about this. We talk about being renewed with our minds. The way we think determines the way we feel. The way we feel determines the way we act. The word metamorphosis is the word. Transformation. So if we think right we feel right, we feel right we act right. If we think like God wants us to… how do we do that? It’s a heart issue. So we’re gonna think right. We’ll think on the things of God. We’ll encourage one another, help one another, words of life, words of organic fruit fill our stomachs and set the die for our lives, we speak life, not death. If we think on those things we’ll feel those things, and if we feel those things we’ll act on those things. So the way we think determines the way we feel. The way we feel determines the way we act. Garbage in-garbage out. What are you concentrating on? What are you drinking? What am I drinking? What am I concentrating on? This is huge stuff, it’s a deep issue. It’s not like,
“Wow, today Ed talked about don’t cuss. I guess I just won’t cuss. When things happen that are bad I will just count to 10, or maybe 25 and that’ll be it. Hu-hu-hu. Let’s start a Cussin’ Club and put in 25 cents every time you say something bad.”
No, no, no! It’s much, much, much deeper than that. It’s a heart issue! It’s an issue of worship.
Some are clueless. Some are capricious. Others, and this is a scary one, a scary category, are callous. Hard-hearted. They just thumb their nose in the face of God.
“I’m gonna do what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna say what I’m gonna say.” I meet people like that a lot. They find out I’m a pastor and they’ll tell me the worst joke, use the most vulgar language.
A while back I was having dinner and across from me sat this guy in his mid-60’s, from the Midwest. He was dropping the F-bomb, I mean, adjective, adverb. It was unbelievable. One of the most creative cussers I’ve ever heard. And we’re called to be around people who use bad language and tell dirty jokes. We don’t get involved in that activity, we’re called to do that. And God will give you the strength to do it, to build those relationships.
Well, I’m listening to this guy and another guy walks up, who I’ve known for years, who is a spectacular swearer himself. And he walks up and sits down. And this guy is just using the F-bomb here, there, and yonder. And finally my friend goes,
“Hey! What are you doing? This is the reverend! Don’t talk like that in front of him! You need to apologize to him!” I said, “Man, don’t apologize to me. Apologize to thee.” People say, “Oh, it just slipped out… pardon my French, reverend. I’m sorry.” I go,
“Hey, don’t apologize to me, apologize to God. I mean I’ve heard every word in the book.” Again, you have two spectacular swearers and the spectacular swearer #1 from the Midwest in his mid-60’s stopped like that. And the other guy, another spectacular swearer, stopped like that. If we can control it (and these guys aren’t even followers of Christ), if they can control it, think what can happen as we tap into the power of the Holy Spirit of God. Think of the potential in our tongues! They’re petite but powerful. The words of life and death. So don’t apologize to me, apologize to thee.
Here’s your homework. 1. I want to challenge you to do a vulgarity audit of your life. Need I explain more? If you can’t get that then maybe we can talk after the service. Parents, a vulgarity audit. Kids, a vulgarity audit. Some of the video games and movies and songs and trash that we feed on. It’s time to take out the trash! Garbage in-garbage out. We gotta take out the trash! We’ve got to do that regularly, don’t we? Don’t be a hoarder. Take out the trash! Do an audit. Allow the Holy Spirit of God to power-wash your soul. Don’t get drunk on the Cool-Aid, drink the living water, the living water of the Lord Jesus Christ.
One more thing. I said it’s a heart issue. You heard me. All this stuff we’re talking about, it’s a heart issue. It’s more than just biting your tongue, it’s more than just counting to 10, it’s a heart issue. And my friend I talked to a while back, 40 years old, I told him. I said all this stuff we’re talking about, vulgarity, expletives that have become adjectives and adverbs, it’s an internal thing. He was honest. He goes,
“Man, I’ve missed the mark!” and I said,
“Well I know I have. But Jesus has hit the mark for us.” He lived righteously, something we can never do. He died sacrificially, something of course we can never do. He rose bodily. He has paved the path, the course, for you and me to know him. Do you know him? He wants to power-wash your soul, your Cool-Aid-covered soul with living water, of forgiveness and mercy and grace. Are you gonna continue to trample over the blood of Jesus? The creature telling the Creator what to do? Or are you gonna say, “Jesus, have your way in my life.” It’s time. Today is the day for many of you at all of our environments to make this decision. Those who are watching online, those who are watching this all over the world. Those who are in Miami, Dallas, Fort Worth, Plano, right here in Grapevine. Those who will hear this on a podcast, it’s time for you to allow Jesus to power-wash your soul. Let’s pray together.
[Ed leads in closing prayer.]